Month: August 2015
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Motherhood
One of my greatest obsessions (goals/dreams/concerns, it is many things) since adulthood is to be a mother. And with any other obsessions, it comes with its own set of neurotic fretting.
There is my superstitious fear of jinxing it – I’m mortally afraid that by pure virtue of claiming a future status of mom would exclude me from the fortune. I’ve come across too many accounts of women who have had a hard time conceiving or carrying their child to term to be assured of a smooth pregnancy. At the same time, women give birth every day, every second, all around the world. So is it difficult or easy to have a child???
There is the self-doubting fear of would I be a good one? If I had a choice in what my magnum opus would be, it would be my child(ren). It is also the lifework I most don’t want to screw up. But what if I do? Raising a child is difficult. Your child is a living, breathing human being – and also the most variable object to work with. Having a child is to concede and adapt to losing control over the thing you’re supposed to control.
Another crippling, consuming fear is that my child may be [this is very politically incorrect] handicapped in any way. I have felt pangs of horror thinking about the possibility of Down’s Syndrome. Even spelling it out makes me antsy. Now this is very, very unfair of me to say and parents of handicapped children have my greatest respect. My fear is stemmed in a belief that no matter what I find out, I would bear the child – and potentially live with the guilt of watching my child suffer. Nuuuu.
These are typically the worries of heavily hormonal pregnant women. Here I am, fetal-free and 22, already praying for a safe and healthy child. Omg, what a wreck I would be when pregnant.
On a not completely unrelated note, I have been lambasted on ‘feminist’ grounds for placing motherhood above many of my goals. That instead I should think about what I want, not subjugated by societal ideals. That is so far one of the most ridiculous claims I’ve heard under the guise of ‘feminism’. Please. Being a feminist is about what I want to be, independent of patriarchal and societal pressures – EVEN if it coincides with societal ideals. Anyone who thinks I want to be a mother because the world wants me to must not know me very well. Anyone who thinks motherhood is an anti-feminist concept is just –
not welcome on my blog.
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JC Tuition
Hi, I am offering JC1-2 tuition for General Paper, Literature, and History.Am a formal Hwachong JC student with GCE A Level As in the following subjects. Please contact me at wqingtan@gmail.com if interested!Taken ^^
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Tiny Tits and Indignity
Went to get a bra yesterday at Pierre Cardin, only to face the indignity of being told they don’t come in my size – because i’m too small.
“Oh this brand seldom stocks anything smaller than B70… most places don’t.”
For most of my life I’ve worn bras slightly too large – or when I discovered online shopping – ordered them online (usually at a higher price). No, I refuse to buy from Young Hearts because i demand my right to sensible bras with underwire. What I don’t understand is
1) Why am I paying more for less material?
2) I’m pretty sure there are girls in Singapore with my cup size, so why the total lack of supply for it?I’m an A70, because i’m an Asian and will not cease until i get all my As. Also it means i’m more susceptible to lower boob fats. The market exists, Singapore! Where are my fitting bras? I’m fully aware that my breasts are on the miniature end of the bell curve, but does that mean i’m not entitled to support like everyone else? They are tiny but they are here you know! The indignity.
On a more serious note though, there is the problem of girls buying misfitting bras and passing them off as okay. At an age where they’re still growing (and they grow all the way up to 21, for some), this can be stunted or misshapen growth.
When i first got my proper adult A70 bra, i never knew how much i’d been missing on. It was like a “OHHH so that’s what a bra’s supposed to feel like” moment. It doesn’t just provide the right support, but makes them bigger (i’m talking non pushed ups here) because they are built for your precious As.
Singapore needs to stop this tiny tit discrimination and step up with bras for everyone.
Q 